Ghosting through Life

My uncle has cancer. We have watched him drop pounds and his skin become papery and opaque. There have been times when I thought he would simply become transparent and then fade into the air as I watched. He fights to live for us, but what he has achieved is mere existence. He is alive but he doesn't really get to live. Watching him makes me appreciate small things about my life every day. I can walk. I can drive. I can even stay up for longer than thirty minutes at a stretch. When I think of all the personal freedom he no longer has, I realize there are worse things than death. Like the half life he clings to so tenaciously. I am under no illusions that he does so for himself. He hangs on for us; waiting for my family to realize what I have. I can't speak for them, but the smile Uncle Bob gives me as I smuggle in food unsanctioned by his doctor tells me he is aware I now understand what he has been trying to tell me. Death is not to be feared, getting so busy one forgets to live life should be . From now on, I am going to live. If for no other reason than to guarantee that my uncle didn't hang around in vain.